Phoenix Eats: Rehab Burger Therapy

I love burgers.

It's one of my weaknesses.

A good, juicy, medium burger, a little crispy on the edges with nice flavorful meat....holy wow.

Add some cold, crunchy pickles, some Thousand Island and grilled onions, and you basically have my heart.

I search all the time for a really, really good burger place.

It has to have it all, too: excellent fries that aren't cold, stiff, or flavorless, good quality, juicy meat that is seasoned just right, and of course plenty of awesome sauces for me to dip my stuff in.

I'm a cumpulsive dipper.

Eat with me more than once and you can memorize my repitoir by heart: Waitress brings the food, I get excited like a little kid, as she's backing away slowly and offering the obligatory "anything else I can get you?" I am grabbing her by the elbow and asking for every sauce possible. I need ranch, spicy mayo, chipotle aeoli, the works, WHATEVER YOU HAVE THAT MY FRIES CAN SWIM IN.

Recently I found this place in Old Town Scottsdale.

No, not technically Phoenix, but really most of the food joints I recommend are not technically Phoenix.

Locals know that the word "Phoenix" can generally refer to anything in a reasonable distance from where you are. Scottsdale, Chandler, Tempe, Ahwatukee, parts of Mesa, Paradise Valley and even sometimes West Phoenix can really mean Peoria, Glendal, even Surprise.

It's all relative, baby.

Back to the point: food.

So I found this place, and after the first BITE I was mad in love.

The fries are amazing. They have what Rehab calls "Mermaid dust" on them, and it's a zesty, lemony, salty seasoning that goes so good with ranch you'll want to punch yourself in the face.

Also, they have spicy Ketchup, y'all. That's taking dipping sauces to a whole new level.

And then there are the burgers.

Juicy, meaty, flavorfull and cooked just right.

If you like your burgers the way I described them above then when you go, ask for this:

"Relapse size MacGnarly burger, medium, extra pickles, fries, chipotle for dipping and a Coke, extra ice."

BAM.

Just made your day, didn't I?