The Friday Diary: Halloween and Junk

Happy Friday everyone.

I want to apologize for the complete lack of posting lately. It was a weird week {side eye: pms and ever present Halloween candy}. I promise to do better next week. I already have a couple good posts scheduled, so, hold onto your reading hats!

I'm already sorry that I said that.

Moving on.

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Letters:

Dear Halloween Candy, You are one of the reasons I had kids.

Dear New Neighborhood, I am torn between wanting you to get more kids so we're not one of like two families out trick or treating, and wanting you to stay this way forever because I'm pretty sure we got like all your candy. 

Dear Jackson, You stole something from the grocery store and I made you take it back and apologize to the manager. You didn't seem very shaken by this. Only pissed that you didn't get to keep the shit you stole. Where did I go wrong in my parenting?

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Overheard:

Bill: Once girls start dating, they want to spend like all their time with the guy, then once they spend all their time with him, they want to live together, then once they live together, they want to get married, then once they get married, they want to make like a blood pact or something. Who knows what comes after that.

I hate boys.

Especially the ones I love.

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Read:

Full article here.

This thing cracked me up in that "it's funny cuz it's sad cuz it's true" sort of way. 

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Pinterested:

Word.

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Made:

Recipe here. 

Not gonna lie, it was a little anticlimactic. Maybe I seriously fucked something up, I don't know, but I just did not love it. 

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Alright, now for the Halloween photo dump:

It's nearly impossible to get a picture of Jackson that isn't blurry. Lainie is missing so many teeth she can barely eat solid foods, but I can't feel all that bad for her because she's so freaking cute with her toothless little grin.

Happy Friday, homies.