While We Were Apart

I think about the time that we spent apart
All the time.
I think about how it felt to be without you,
On days when I feel like all I want to do is complain and whine and be difficult.
I remember how I felt when I completely lost you.
The dark time, when we weren't even friends.
When your name wasn't one that I could even say out loud,
Without feeling the sore spot throb
Like being struck upon a bruise.
The time when everyone thought they knew what was best for me,
And no one understood why I was still waiting for you to take me back home.
I think about how it felt,
To be vanishing into a crowd of people who knew me,
And somehow didn't understand me at all.
Longing for home again.
But home
Was a feeling I'd buried in you.
I think about how far down other roads we had both traveled
Both simultaneously looking back at the point in our journey where we last stood together,
Wishing the other person would open their mouth,
And say what we were both thinking,
End all this pointless suffering.
I think about the little things
And how if each one of them hadn't happened
We may never have found our way back to each other.
I would still be looking out each window,
Every where I went
Wishing I was somewhere
Anywhere
With you.