Sunday, November 4, 2012

A Brief History of Best Friends


I've had a lot of friends in my life. I've met a lot of people, and I've lost a lot of people, and I've learned that friendships-at least between girls- can be just as tenuous if not more so than intimate relationships with lovers. If you've ever read like even one single other post from this blog, you know I love Grey's Anatomy. It's a medical show, which makes the medi-nerd in me happy, but more than that it's a show about relationships, and how they define us. How they shape us, change us, carry us through the bad times, and help us get from one day to the next. I love, of course, Meredith and McDreamy's torrid love affair {largely because of how closely it resembles me and Bill's relationship} but more than that I think it's Meredith and Cristina's friendship that always holds my attention. 
They are the truest definition of best friends.
They fight, they piss each other off, they put their jobs and their boyfriends first sometimes, but they're each other's person, and they would do anything, without question or second thought for each other. They tell each other the mistakes they make without any fear of rejection or judgment, and they call each other on their bullshit without any fear of it ruining the bond they have.
I've always wanted a friendship like that.
I've come close before, I think.
Friends that have listened to all my heartbreaks and fuck ups and bad decisions, nodded understandingly at hearing my mistakes, and always answered their phone when I fell on my ass yet again. But I always end up compartmentalizing my friends in some way. Friends I can tell this to, but not that. Friends I'll open up to about these things, but not those. Friends I can go out with and ones I go to the movies with, and ones I go to dinner with, and ones I stay home on Friday nights with. More importantly, friends I will drink with and friends I will only ingest coffee in the presence of. 
Outside of an intimate relationship with someone I am in love with, I have yet to find an all encompassing friendship with someone of the same gender. A best girlfriend. 
For that reason, I hesitate to call someone my "best friend", and if I do, it's in a situation where I call all my friends my best friends. Because they are. They are all the very best at the things that they do. 
But still I wonder what it's like to have that one very absolute best girlfriend. The one who will be my maid of honor at my wedding without question, the one who I can call my person, and know that no matter what, they're in my corner. 

I guess I'm looking for my Cristina Yang. The person that if I killed someone, she's the one I'd call to help me drag the body across the living room floor. 

What about you?
Do you have a best friend?

1 comment:

  1. I actually have a Cristina Yang in my life! She even looks a little bit like her, and she has that same uncaring, unfeeling kind of way about her. But through the years, she has shown me that she is absolutely my "person." We've been through hell and back together, we've had epic battles against each other, but at the end of the day, we both know that we love each other and we will be there for one another, no matter what.