I mentioned last week that the kids had both gotten lice this month.
Let's all pause for a moment and do a collective OHMYGODGROSS.
Lice is gross. And nearly fucking impossible to control.
The shit spreads like wildfire, and once it's in your home and life you may as well burn the house to the ground, change your name and move to Brazil.
When Lainie first got sent home from school with lice, I was like "It's cool bro. I got this."
I picked her up, swung by the daycare to get Jack, and checked them both once we got home.
Yep. both had lice.
Ew.
We headed to Walmart and I had every intention of buying that over the counter shampoo they sell in the pharmacy, until I read the ingredients and the warnings.
That shit is straight pesticides.
PESTICIDES in your kids hair.
Soaking in their skin.
Running all over their bodies.
Yeah. No.
I get that lice are bugs, and you typically use pesticides to kill bugs, but bathing my kids in poison as a FIRST resort didn't really seem cool.
So we instead headed to Sprouts.
There we loaded up on Tea Tree Oil, which I know almost all bugs hate. It's antifungal, antimicrobial, and it disinfects better than bleach and peroxide.
We also picked up this stuff.
It's all natural and full of good herbs like Rosemary and Cedar oil. Also it smells delicious, but I'm apparently the only one who thinks that {the kids hate the smell of lemongrass oil, which is in here}.
After that we went home and I started up The Google. I searched for home remedies for lice, and holy wow, you guys. I found so much.
There are upwards of 20 credible and natural ways to take care of lice, without using pesticides.
We tried the following:
1. Wash both the kids hair with Dawn dish soap {the blue stuff} and let it soak for 20 minutes {also, read this article on all the crazy uses for blue Dawn dish soap. You can use that shit for anything}.
2. Follow up by washing with Selsun Blue dandruff shampoo {the Selsun Naturals kind with Salycilic Acid in it} Let that soak for 20 minutes.
3. Go outside in the bright sunshine and pick out all the dead bugs - and they will be dead, and as many of the eggs as you can.
4. Blow dry the hair on hot and on high, holding the dryer as close to the roots as you can. This will loosen the remaining bugs and make them easier to find, and also destroy the remaining eggs.
5. For Lainie I followed up the blow dry with flat ironing her hair at the roots. The direct, high heat kills the eggs and dissolves the glue that's holding them to the hair strands.
6. Slather mayo on the hair, especially at the roots and scalp. Put a shower cap on, and let it sit for as long as you can. 1 hour is good. 2 hours is better. Overnight is ideal.
7. Use more Dawn to wash out the mayo
8. Wash the hair one last time with the lice shield shampoo.
9. Check again for eggs, remove any that are remaining, and then rub tea tree oil mixed with olive oil at the nape of the neck, behind the ears, and put a few drops on the scalp, in as many places as you can.
Next you have to start disinfecting your house.
Bag your stuffed animals and dolls, and tie them closed with as little air in the bag as possible.
Throw them outside in direct sun for 2 days.
Do the same with any pillows that cannot be washed.
After the two days, spray all that stuff with tea tree oil and water, and throw it in the dryer on high heat for 2 cycles just to be safe.
Wash all your clothes.
Seriously, everything.
Vacuum every corner and crevice of your house, spray the mattress with tea tree oil and water and bag them for 48 hours. After that, vacuum them too, as well as the couch and any upholstered furniture.
If you have cloth seats in your car, spray those too, close the doors, and park the car in the sun all day so it's hot as hell inside.
Then vacuum like a motherfucker.
It's a lot of work.
It's a pain in the ass.
But if you have kids, at some point you'll probably have to deal with this, so be prepared.
May the force be with you.
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