My Happy Birthday

Today started off good, with my best work friend Chris bringing me flowers and dark chocolate {pink roses-my favorite!} to me in the morning, and then a delicious lunch with her, Bill and our other work pal Hector, at DeFalco's in Scottsdale.

As you can see by the first picture, I was given my very own Canon Rebel.

I very nearly had a heart attack. This is almost the exact same camera that Bill and I got to play with in Italy. The camera that I fell so desperately in love with it was ridiculous.

And now I have one!

I can take pictures of everything I eat for the rest of my life.

You don't have to say it, Bill, I already know you're excited.

I also got a lovely apron and oven mit {shown above} from Bill's fantastic sister Lori.

I'm telling you, this lady is a seriously amazing gift giver. 

No surprise, really, Bill is too.

The apron was something I've been coveting since I saw it on Pinterest over a month ago, and I was so happy that I wrote Lori a very sincere and awkward thank you note that should be creeping up her mailbox in the next few days.

And then she will regret ever giving me presents, fucking immediately.

To wrap it all up, the kids and I went out for steak and fried pickles for dinner, and I learned that Jackson is already a medium rare steak kind of guy. When his meat wasn't red enough in the middle, he asked to send it back.

A boy after my own heart.

So this has been a truly lovely birthday, and so far being 25 is starting out pretty damn well.

Thank you to all the people who made it special.

I truly am one very lucky birthday girl.

xoxo

The Friday Diary: Stuff and Things

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 I am absolutely loving Ray Lamontagne  right now. I listen to it all day at work {aka when I can get away with wearing headphones} and while I'm falling asleep at night, with a little Rainy Mood in the background to provide some white noise.
Those two things after a scalding hot shower? Mama's out like a light in 3...2....1

...

Overheard:

Bill: That's so interesting. Fill my vessel with your knowledge.

Me: That's disgusting. Don't ever tell me to fill your anything with my anything ever again.

Bill: Yeah, but it got you to stop talking. That was pretty cool.

Me: Worst. Boyfriend. Ever.

Except for that he's not. He's the best.

He still says disgusting things though.

 ...

Born:

Giovanni Valentino. My newest nephew, making a total of 4 nephews, added to my 3 nieces, and now us four kids have given my dad 9 grand kids. Crazy.

...

Watched:

The Watch

It wasn't the highest brow humor I've ever seen, but it was definitely funny. We laughed through most of it. Someone did bring a baby into the theater though, and I did not laugh at that.

Not. Even. Once.

...

Reminisced:


Dawson's Creek is now available on Netflix. Since I'm out of Grey's episodes and I've watched Sleepless in Seattle more times than I can-or am willing to-count, I decided on a whim to start watching Season One of Dawson's on Sunday night. This show pretty much instantly takes me back to 1998, watching this show every single week with my sisters and the kids next door, all of us piled on the couches together, watching this unbelievably cheesy teen melodrama unfold with baited breath.
Nothing makes me want to bust out my Shawn Culvin CD and puka shell necklace like this show. Maybe next I'll watch Charmed and start wearing Tommy Girl perfume again.

...

Discovered:

Marion Bolognesi's watercolors. I absolutely can't handle how beautiful this one is. It takes my breath away-literally-every time I look at it.

...

Pinterested:


Check it out. It's a Nana fight.

...

So. That's the haps these days on the internets. I hope you all had a fantastic week. Stay tuned for next week, when I turn 25 and inevitably do something embarrassing whilst celebrating my birthday. Like I do every single year.
Hey, remember the year Bill made me drink alcohol out of a plunger on my birthday?!

I do.


Happy Friday.

More Things I Don't Get

I think it's official. 

I'm incapable of being successfully trendy. I try, I do, but I just never seem to understand the majority of trends. 

Pinterest never seems to fail in the area of giving me more shit I just don't get. Sometimes when I'm browsing it's pages {for hours} I stumble upon things that make me think "why?"

Things like:

Wine Cork Crafts

Wreathes, coasters, picture frames, cork boards...the ideas are endless. And ridiculous. As the daughter of a hoarder, I sometimes want to comment on these things and remind people: wine corks are trash. They are no better than the lids to your milk cartons. And really, you only get them from finishing a bottle of wine. So having enough to make a HUGE wreath out of them...doesn't that really just scream "Look what an alcoholic I am!" I mean, if you saw someone collect all their cigarette butts and paint them fancy colors, then make shit out of them, you'd be disgusted. Why is this any better? Because wine is classier?

Um, if you've ever seen a housewife on her  4th glass of white after an emotional episode of Sex and the City, you'd find nothing classy about wine.

The Obsessive Need to Improve Things:

Do you know where I got the above picture?

From a pin about how you don't have to peel hard boiled eggs if you cut them in half and then scoop the insides out with a spoon.

Really?

Because it's so fucking hard to peel a damn egg?

And because busting out TWO utensils instead of using your damn hands and a garbage bag actually makes anything any easier?

Don't get me wrong, I am all for improving life in small ways and I have found endless ways to organize my house, exfoliate my face and spend 200 bucks a month on groceries for 3 people.

But some improvements are just stupid.

I want to see a pin that's about using something for it's actual purpose.

Making Fat Foods Skinny Foods:

I don't get this, and not only do I not understand it, it pisses me off. DON'T MAKE MY FAT FOODS SKINNY.

If I am going to break down and eat junk food, I want the satisfaction of eating my self loathing in the form of saturated fat, calories, refined sugars and carbs. Glorious, glorious carbs.

If I want to eat healthy, I want it to taste freaking healthy so I can feel smug and self righteous about myself after eating it.

I don't want to be all "Oooh that cucumber tasted like pizza thanks to this recipe I found involving chili powder and Quinoa" I want to be all "Hey, that cucumber I just ate tasted EXACTLY like a damn cucumber and I ate it anyway. ON PURPOSE. I rule!"

Some awesome "skinny" recipes you can find online:

Skinny cheese fries. What. The. Fuck.

Skinny barbecue

Skinny quesadillas.

Really, just fucking shoot me.

Recipe: Egg Muffin Things!

Breakfast foods are delicious, I think we can all agree on that!

But, a lot of them are bad for you and the ones that aren't never seem to fill me up, and bananas make my stomach hurt.

I only add that because people are always screaming about bananas in or around my breakfast foods, and I'm here to tell you: it's not like the mascot fruit of morning meals, ok?

Geeze.

Anyway, when I was in high school I could totally go all morning without eating a bite, and not feel hungry until around noon.

Yeah.

Not so much anymore.

It seems like every year older I get the earlier I need to eat. I should transition nicely into senior citizenship, seeing as how I'm only a cup of coffee with my 4 p.m. dinner away from being my Nana. 

Now that I do need breakfast, I've also learned I need protein.

So step the fuck off cereal, cuz you don't do shit for me!

The solution?

EGGS!

I love eggs in the morning. 2 hardboiled eggs will fill me up and carry me through to 11:30 for lunch without a problem. It's awesome.

But, after eating 2 hard boiled eggs every morning at work for 2 weeks, I'm fucking over it.

Looking for a way to spice it up, I went to the only place that understands me: Pinterest. 

There I found this recipe:

For egg sandwiches.

Really I didn't have much intention to make egg sandwiches, but I liked the idea of cooking eggs in a muffin pan in the oven instead of on the stove, and I thought to myself "Self! You could add shit to the eggs whilst they're cooking and make them even more delicious!"

It was a stroke of genius.

So, I made these:

Egg Muffin Things!

I know, brilliant name. Nobody steal it, ok?

Basically I just dropped some muffin liners into a muffin pan {because even with Pam eggs can stick to muffin pans REAL BAD. Just ask my friend Chris's old muffin pan. It's in the trash now.} and cracked one egg into each liner. 

Like so.

Then I chopped up some spinach and tomato to make these a little more flavorful but still healthy.

Then I baked them at 350 for 15 minutes.

After that amount of time they were still runny in the middle, so back in the oven they went.

Five minutes later they were perfect, and looked like this:

Before baking them I'd also thrown in some salt, pepper and garlic powder for taste.

In the end they were delicious. They tasted like the egg sandwich patties on the Egg McMuffins at McDonalds, only real and less greasy.

Next time I might do a few with salsa and a few with breakfast sausage or bacon and cheese or something.

Hey, you can't eat healthy ALL the time, right?!

{No, the answer is no. Stop saying yes, yes you can. BECAUSE YOU CAN'T.}

The Friday Diary: Photo Dump

Hellooooo Friday.

This Friday isn't as special as other Fridays, and definitely less special than last Friday. 

Why? Because I have to work this Friday AND it's not payday.

I know, the world weeps for me.

Anyway, let's wrap this bitch up.

 

...

This week has been interesting, what with my car decided it suddenly hates me and wants to commit vehicular suicide now and all. Aside from researching car loans with ridiculous interest rates and crying over my imagine-the-worst speculation over what could be wrong with my car, I haven't done much of anything. Seriously, I haven't done laundry like all week. It's a sad state of affairs up in here.

But I promise to get my shit together and clean this weekend before the dishes start growing limbs and the clothes start smelling like...Jackson.

If you need me this weekend I will be trapped under a pile of laundry.

...

Finished:

I finally finished all 8 seasons of Grey's and can now wait in dark, twisty angst with the rest of the super obsessed fan population for season 9. 

Is it wrong that I was a little OK with Lexie dying? 

Bitch annoyed the shit out of me.

...

Flashback:

This time last year, my business was failing, my relationship was falling apart and my roommate was moving out. We were struggling financially and I was on the brink of a nervous breakdown.

It was really fun.

It's a good thing I wrote all about it, so now we can all look back and remember fondly.

...

Pinteresting:

That's what I keep saying.

...

Failed:

I've so far gotten absolutely nowhere with operation: get Jack the fuck out of my bed. I can't even say I've really tried that hard.

But homeboy is getting big, and now it's just a matter of how many more kicks to the face and head butts to the ribs I will take before he has to endure banishment.

This little foot narrowly escaped kicked me in the face when it suddenly popped up on my shoulder during my 12 a.m. Pinterest session.

I want my damn bed back.

...

 Addicted:

I bought more $1 books from the Scottsdale library.

Someone, please, stop me. I can't help myself.

...

LOLZ:

I know. I'm a terrible person.

But you know you said that in Forest Gump's voice.

...

 And now, for some pictures from my phone.

Take it away, Blackberry!

1. Jackson enjoying an ice cream at Culver's, a rare treat. 

2 & 3. Jackson enjoying the first orange he peeled by himself. 

4. Late night Grey'sAnatomy and pretzel M&M's. {and why yes, my computer is missing like a million keys. Why? See pictures 1, 2, 3, 6 and 7} 

5. Lainie looking much too grown up and pretty for her age. 

6. Lainie and Jack staying up late to watch Wednesday night's sudden thunder and rainstorm. 

7. Jackson "washing the car" when we stopped for gas Friday afternoon. Adorable. 

8. I dyed my hair. The one on the left is the box color. The one on the right is what it did to my hair. Pretty, but not the same. Also it looks pink under the florescent lights in my office. Awesome. 

9. Lainie, rocking my aviator sunglasses better than I do. 

10. Clearly it's a huge deal when it rains in Phoenix 11. Veggie hummus wraps= Summer dinner at least once a week. 

Happy Friday.

Recipe: Individual Pot Pies

I have a confession. It's something you've probably already guessed or figured out about me on your own. I am a comfort food junkie. I love it. All kinds of it. If I could have a super power, it'd be really hard not to choose "Eating Everything Without Getting Fat or Unhealthy".

I like to think that's every girls dream. 

I digress.

Among the many comfort foods that I love, pot pies have always been one of my favorites.

I like them so much that when I first moved out on my own I even bought the shitty, death in a box 79 cent ones from Walmart because I was broke, but still couldn't live without their warm flaky goodness.

When I saw this recipe on Pinterest, I thought to myself "Self, you can totally make those"

And I did.

Except I didn't have Bisquick so I subbed in two sheets of seamless Pillsbury crescent roll dough instead, and cut out circles the size of the holes in my muffin pan, one for the top and one for the bottom of each pie.

I boiled 1 lb of boneless, skinless chicken tenders and shredded them, then mixed 1/2 of the chicken with 1 can cream of chicken soup, and 2 cups frozen mixed veggies.

I seasoned that mix with garlic powder, salt, pepper and cajun seasoning {i put that shit on everything}

I sprayed my muffin pan with a ton of Pam so the pies wouldn't stick, and placed a dough circle in each muffin hole.

I spooned the chicken mixture in, careful not to overfill the holes, sprinkled with cheese, and covered with the top dough circle.

Then I kind of tucked the top piece of dough down around the sides of the filling so it'd get as close to the bottom piece as possible hoping that the two pieces would rise to meet each other and hold the filling in, which they pretty much did.

Then I baked them at 350 for 10 minutes.

After 10 minutes, I pulled them out, brushed the tops with melted butter and sprinkled with Oregano and a little more garlic powder, and popped them back in the oven for another 10 minutes.

Perfection!

My kids went nuts over them. Lainie-who normally eats like a little bird, ate 3 of them, and wolfed them down at that, and Jackson, who has a big appetite but always fights me at dinner time over eating all his food these days, ate 2 of them with no complaint or struggle!

I call that a hearty success.

The Friday Diary: I Have Today Off, Suckers!

Happy Friday everybody!

Isn't Friday awesome?

Don't answer that, because I already know the answer, and the answer is fuck yes.

Fridays are especially awesome when you don't have to work. 

Which I don't. 

Suck it, corporate world.

Today, whilst I am laying in bed reading a stack of books {a chapter or two of each, rotating frequently of course} and eating Chinese food, I will leave you with a nice little recap of the nothing I did this week. 

Enjoy.

 

{It's not Friday until you get down to a little Enrique, ya heard?!}

...

Overheard:
Jackson: Lainie how does honey happen?
Lainie: Bees make honey
Jackson: No, bees make me cry when they sting me
Lainie: Yeah, but they also make honey.
Jackson: I don't believe you
Lainie: They do! They fly around getting flower juice from all the flowers, and that's called nectar. Then they mix it with pollen, which is like their fur, and that makes honey. Then they deliver it to the people and people sell it in stores.
Jackson: I don't believe you still.
Lainie: Then why don't you go ask mom?
Jackson: Because it's none of her business.

Sassy pants.

...

Watched:

Savages.
I was disappointed.
It's the movie a horny 19 year old stoner who loves UFC fights and carrying a hand gun down the waistband of his Hollister pants would write.
Oliver Stone. What happened to you??

...

Worn:

I don't normally do this. Post about the shit I wear. Mainly because I'm terrible at dressing myself.
But I went as a Hipster to work the other day and at the time it seemed noteworthy.
Not as much now.
I don't get fashion.

...

Pinterested:


Word.

...

Reading:


In typical "a million years behind every trend" fashion, I am finally reading this book.
It better be amazing.
I need some amazing, you feel me?

...

Loved:

I got flowers at work on Thursday!
And chocolate.
But I ate the chocolate before I could photograph it.
There's just no time to fuck around with cameras when chocolate is involved, people!
Anyway, Bill loves me. And I'm the luckiest girl in the history of ever.

...

And now for some phone pictures, because I've ran out of real things to tell you about:

1. Taking yet another picture of my son sleeping. Jack will surely be creeped out by all the pictures of him sleeping when he's older.

2. Our kitchen, finally kid-artworked-out. We always have a wall or a pantry door or a somewhere in our house that is dedicated to showing the kids' artwork. Lainie pointed out that we hadn't made one yet in our new house, so we rectified that lickety split. Looking at it makes me happy.

3. A nice round of Candy Land with the kids. I forgot how easy this game is. There's almost no thinking involved at all. Which is nice when it's Thursday night and you're tired. #lazyparenting. 4. Daycare is hard. 

Happy Friday everybody!